Careful Optimism, 90's blues and my plea to the Dawgs

Well, folks, it has finally arrived. All my years on this Earth and and never have I been able to experience this special time. It is something you dream about, something you yearn for and when it does not happen, once again, you feel yourself dejected and saying "wait til next year." As for the lucky few who have tasted the water from the Holy Grail (+1 for Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade), I am jealous and want to be in the club. I'm like Smalls in "The Sandlot," I am in the treehouse with everybody but I don't know how to make a Smore. I'm like Aerosmith, I've been on the cusp of greatness, but just cannot quite break through. I'm like Keanu Reeves, I've been successful, but nobody takes me seriously. Well, that time has finally drawn nigh. No longer are we waiting in line and hoping for a shot. No more will we wait in the shadows and praying others will fail. I'm talking about the Black Friday sale at Bloomingdale's, of course. God help the person who cuts me off on the way to the Yves St. Laurent display in the men's cologne section, somebody is gonna lose an arm. Somebody asked me, "what is Black Friday like in New York?" I simply replied, "Dogs and cats...... living together!! Mass hysteria!" (+1 for Ghostbusters reference) It is disgusting.

No. My Dawgs are in control of their own destiny. We are like Alicia Silverstone after making "Clueless" or Michael Keaton after he made "Batman," we have the world at our fingertips, all we have to do is step up and take it. So, are we going to do it? Or are we going to disappear inexplicably like those people did? Seriously, Silverstone and Keaton were poised to be Hollywood mainstays and absolutely faded from existence in the 90's. You know it's bad when you have to post a picture of yourself regurgitating food into your baby's mouth for attention. I guess Michael Keaton will have to pull a Honey Badger....attack and eat a cobra's head off...to one-up that little stunt.

The game this weekend is the biggest home game that we have had in 30 years. Playing our arch-rival, on ESPN, while both teams are peaking. Well, I guess Georgia Tech can be considered "peaking," you do not get much lower than losing by 14 points at home to Middle Tennessee State. Yet, I am nervous. We have choked away games in the past to lesser opponents. Let's face it, nothing would make Tech happier than to ruin our shot at the BCS National Championship. The younger generation of Dawg fans do not consider Tech a rival anymore, considering that Richt is 10-1 against them and they have only beaten us once, fair and square, in the last twenty years. However, truth be told, they did beat us three years in a row in the late 90's, illegal players or not. I can say that losing to Tech is the most despicable and awful experience I have ever had as a Dawg fan. Nothing can prepare you for the unbridled jaw-jacking, Chicken Little-turned-Incredible Hulk attitude of the Tech fanbase after a win over us. In fact, there are only a few things in life that depressed me more than a loss to Tech:

1) Zack Morris and Kelly Kapowski breaking up on Prom Night because of her fling with Jeff, the new manager of The Max. Oh Jeff, how I hated you;

2) Cadbury Creme Eggs only existing in the United States during Easter;

3) The disappearance of Surge, the Coca-Cola drink that contained 12,876 grams of sugar;

4) The deaths of the lead singers of the Spin Doctors, Blind Melon and Sublime;

5) Side-spiking, Trapper Keepers and jean jackets were no longer cool.

Their fans screamed "To Hell With Georgia" during our alma mater and their players ripped apart our hedges after their 1998 victory. Then, in 1999, we had the phantom fumble. You would have thought that Tech singlehandedly ended Communism after that win. Another year of listening to smack talk from our in-state rivals from the ACC (Almost Competitive Conference). Believe me, it is a Hell that you do not want to endure. I would rather lose to Florida, Tennessee and Auburn every year. (oh wait, that was the 90's)

I have been thinking about the 90's frequently in the last few weeks. Being a Dawg fan was fun, but it was TOUGH. I remember losing to Southern Miss in 1996. Jim Donnan's first game. Some guy named Brett Favre ran all over the field, throwing impossible passes and sending us back to the locker room with an 11-7 loss. I remember Florida murdering us in Sanford Stadium in 1995 and Spurrier just smirking all game long. Tennessee reeling off nine straight wins, they could have beaten us with Jim Bob Cooter as their starter. (yes, he is a real person and he really played for Tennessee, google him) Vandy beat us at Homecoming in 1994, prompting my Dad to do the unthinkable with nine minutes to go in the fourth...."boys, pack it up because this train is going back to Cassville." Lots of 6-6 and 7-5 years, mediocrity and irrelevance. I also remember the good times. Beating Alabama at home in 1990 on a last second two-point conversion. The four-overtime victory over Auburn in 1996. The beating we gave the Gators in 1997. I will never forget Robert Edwards breaking for that first touchdown, running toward the St. John's River. You could feel the momentum as our sideline erupted. It was those moments that keep you coming back. No matter how angry they would make you, no matter how frustrating it was to watch us stumble week after week, we still packed up that blue and gold Chevy van and headed east out of Cassville at least 3 times every Fall. (I would sit in the back with my Walkman, my Collective Soul CD playing "Shine" over and over, admiring my thirteenth pair of Air Jordans and my tightrolled acid-washed Jordaches.)

We were diehards and still are to this day. I know plenty of people who hop from bandwagon to bandwagon. People who probably would have cheered for Japan in World War Two until the Navy crushed them at Midway and the Marines took Guadalcanal. It must be a tough life to be a turncoat but there are plenty out there. I guess that is the essence of human nature, it's easier to be part of a winner than to struggle with loss and hope to win. Seriously, how many random Texas Tech fans do you know? Now think of Alabama in the last four years, their "fanbase" in Georgia is coming out of the woodwork faster than Keith Marshall's forty time. I sure as hell do not remember them back in 2003, when Bama was at a low point, losing 30-0 at halftime in Athens with a terrible quarterback and a hopeless coach. They were either wearing Red and Black during their Georgia phase or still had not quite given up on Tennessee or Florida State. In any event, I have zero respect for that mindset. Loyalty obviously can be bought with wins, but I'd rather stick by my people. It would be like somebody asking me what my hometown is and I replied, "New York City." Yes, more interesting and important things have happened here. More influential and famous people have lived here. There is more money, more options, and more culture but there is no way, on God's green Earth, that I would ever turn my back on Cassville.

So begins the biggest triumvirate of games for us since Florida-Tech-Notre Dame in 1980. If we make it by Tech, we will likely meet Alabama for the SEC championship with the BCS title shot on the line. Alabama has to beat Auburn this weekend to lock in their spot. The likelihood of an upset here is about as minute as ant dandruff. In fact, only five things are less likely than Auburn defeating Alabama:

1) The Israelis and the Palestinians get together, Netanhayu says, "let's hug it out, bitch" and the Gaza Strip fighting ends forever (+1 for Entourage reference);

2) Tim Tebow leads the Jets to the Super Bowl and wins it, starts dating Eva Longoria and renames his dog "Mark Sanchez"

3) Mary Kate Olsen brings back slap bracelets as a fashion, breaks her wrist demonstrating their uselfulness, thereby igniting a campaign "PAFCSWATUTDHL." People Against Former Child Stars With Anorexia Who Used To Date Heath Ledger.

4) Rural Southerners all look at each other and say, "You know, Mountain Dew has way too much sugar."

5) An Irishman drinks a Budweiser and says, "Ahhhh, that's what Willis was talkin' bout!"

I hope the Dawgs are ready for the Crimson juggernaut because that is what we will see. A strong running game, tough defense and a cutthroat coach who I'm convinced, pulled a Robert Johnson and sold his soul to the Devil on a dirt road in Mississippi. It will be a bloodbath and if we come out on top, then we will have reached the pinnacle. Until then, I am hushing about it all and keeping a quiet optimism. An optimism that I have not felt in my lifetime and one that I hope to feel again in the future. So, let's do it, Dawgs. Do it for yourselves. Do it for your parents, your coaches and your classmates. Do it for your hometown and your state. Do it for all the naysayers. Hush them forever. And lastly, for all us loyalists...those of us who have remained...those of us who came back no matter how grim it may have been. Those of us who lived for Saturdays in Athens or vicariously through Larry on AM 750 when we could not make it to the game. Do it for me and my brother, throwing the football on Hull Street in our Bugle Boys, re-enacting "Run Lindsay Run." For my folks. For Don and Cheryl, Todd and Michelle, Lynn and Chris, Tom and Lori...and all the other Bartow County diehards. For Jeremy, Vinny and Jemel...may our gameday text message train continue to Miami. And if we are on the grand stage in the end and Sugar falls from the Sky......I know it will be Larry and Lewis pouring it on us and oh, how sweet it will be.