Recap of the Weekend...or 0-2 feels like a massage with a Brillo Pad

I needed another day to recover from the exasperating loss in Athens this past Saturday. I have never seen Lady Luck turn her back on us so many times in one game. You cannot spot another SEC team 21 points off turnovers and expect to win. My Dawgs are 0-2 for the first time since 1996. (We lost to Carolina in our second game in 1996 too). Flashes of brilliance followed up with flatfootedness and carelessness. When they ran the fake punt, I actually aged ten years. So I'm 40 now. Twenty two more years and I'll be drawing Social Security. Judging by the way this Administration is going, my SSI money will be borrowed from Taiwan. Oh well, who cares? This weekend was about remembrance anyway. The tributes to the fallen UGA alumni were awesome, especially Noah Harris. Noah was a fraternity brother of mine from Ellijay and he was killed in Iraq in 2005. We used to eat lunch together in Snelling Dining Hall and he showed me the most awesome of snacks, apples with peanut butter. I still eat it today and I think of him every time. RIP brother, we all miss you.

This recap is brought to you by Jack Daniel's Tennessee Sippin' Whiskey, Bombay Dry Gin and Corona Light (watching the figure....sue me).

The tailgate was uneventful. Mostly due to the fact that we were late and North Campus has so many rules and regulations now, that it felt like a game between BYU and Liberty University. For those of you who don't know, BYU students are not allowed to even drink coffee, much less alcohol. I have nothing against this policy, but it just ain't for me. And Liberty....get real. If they say "dagnabbit" they are on the proverbial Number 7 train to Hell with John Rocker. As a sidebar, I saw John Rocker at a UGA game last year, looking like he just got out of a cardboard box under a bridge. (with all due respect to people who live in cardboard boxes under bridges) I remember reading his comments about New York and hoping that at the end of the article he would say, "Psyche! I love New York" or something like that. (Psyche was an awesome 90's saying that I wish would make a comeback.) Alas, he did not. Thank God he is from Georgia and pointed it out several times during that article. The writer had to be salivating like Pavlov's dogs as he listened to that drivel.

The coin flip was won by us and we deferred. Carolina comes out and instantly goes three and out, which was promising, considering how last week went. (We won the toss, proceeded to get three penalties, lose two yards and I ate my hat, puked it back up and ate it again, like a dog) Our offense trots onto the field and I pucker up tighter than a snare drum. I start sweating bullets as the O-Line breaks the huddle. If we have to endure another game plan like the one from Boise, I am going to lose it. No, really. I had it all planned out. I was going to take my shirt off, start doing "The Sprinkler" singing "Shawty Swing My Way" by KP and Envyi. As security whisked me away to jail, the commotion would inspire the offense to run the "Annexation of Puerto Rico" and Isiah Crowell would score untouched for a 7-0 lead. (+1 for Little Giants reference). These are the lengths I will go to for a Dawg win.

The game plan had changed. Bobo was calling the game like an old pro. We advanced the ball on Carolina at will...until we hit the red zone. We bogged down quicker than a Lane Kiffin recruiting trip in East Tennessee. We kick a dadgum field goal. (See? Even mentioning Liberty University makes you pious). They get the ball back and do nothing. We drive down and kick another DADGUM field goal (this piety ain't gonna last). The next two drives are a repeat, except Blair Walsh shanks a knuckleball and misses the damn field goal (whew, that's better). So, we have plowed through their defense only to be up by six. We are holding Lattimore down and flat outplaying them, but we are only up by six. In the Southeastern Conference, you cannot miss opportunities or your opponent will surely make you pay, and pay we did.

We scored touchdowns eventually. Crowell carried the ball 16 times for 118 yards and had two touchdowns. Murray threw some great passes and racked up yards and touchdowns. We scored 42 points...and lost. First was a Crowell fumble that was taken back to our five yard line (I aged five years there). Then a Murray interception that was taken to the house for a touchdown (five more). Finally, Murray was getting sacked and attempted some sort of throw/toss that was fumbled away and the Carolina DE rumbled into the end zone for the winning score (I aged ten years here, so actually I am 60 years old today. Dagnabbit.) Steven Garcia played through his hangover ( I don't know for sure that he did, I just assume it at this point), but he did not really have a great game. He seems to be more consistent when it comes to suspensions and moronic comments. Lattimore had 176 yards BUT never really damaged us until the 4th quarter, when he broke a forty yarder. It was our own mistakes that doomed us. We outplayed them all night. Everybody was making the same statements on the walk back to the car....."woulda, coulda, shoulda." I contemplated walking into oncoming traffic but I figured with our luck, I would get hit by a Honda Element. I would total it and come out uninjured and get sued.

This game may be the beginning of the end of the Richt era. The armchair quarterbacks are suiting up as we speak. Their hindsight is 20/20 and they seem to know everything we did wrong. I personally enjoy listening to middle age, borderline obese guys who couldn't jump over a credit card make comments about football. Support the team or get lost. Go pull for FSU or Tennessee or whoever you pulled for in the 90's. I'm not happy about these losses but I'm not bailing on the guys in the fourth quarter, muttering about how much I donate as I walk back to my car. For starters, I could not donate all that much because my student loans are too high. Secondly, I was so hungry that I couldn't talk. I almost dug through the trash to find a half eaten piece of fried chicken. Lastly, I seem to recall that UGA went 6-5 in 1979 with absolutely no hope of recovery. Dooley was on the hot seat and the program seemed to be on the decline. Then some kid from Wrightsville changed everything. College football is fickle and always has been. We will be back. Go Dawgs!